Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
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