my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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