do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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