Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
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Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
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You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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