and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
can u get pink eye on your cock?
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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