I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
