I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize
