bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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