is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
