I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
