I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
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