Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
