He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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