But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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