As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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