oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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