idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I've blown a few things in my day
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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