this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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