'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
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I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
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He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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