I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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