Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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