i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
You were trust falling into bushes
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
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