I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I feel like death gave me a hand job
The feeling are messing with the penis
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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