none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
