Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
