dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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