Kareoke will never be a sober sport
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
