and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
