my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
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