Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
