I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
