who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
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I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?