I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
