Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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