im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I can tuck mytits in my pants
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
