Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
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Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
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She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
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