On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
