like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Randomize
