I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize