Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
