My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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