is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Enjoy the penises
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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