Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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