Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
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