i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Randomize
