i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize