Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I can't turn off my feet"
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
