I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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