My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
