I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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